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1/2/2019 1 Comment

The Secret to Achieving Your 2019 Resolutions:

Let’s face it: When we started 2018, we set some resolutions, and now that we’ve launched into a new year (oh haiiii 2019!) and have been reflecting on our previous, we’re realizing we uh, didn’t really end up achieving those resolutions like we thought we would.

Here’s the thing about resolutions: They often come from a place of lack, guilt, and obligation. We feel there’s something we need to be doing better; that if we just engaged in X, Y, or Z, we’d be enough, we’d be happy, we’d feel whole; that there’s something we should be doing that we haven’t gotten ourselves to do yet.

It’s no wonder only 8% of people keep their New Year’s resolutions (Forbes)! When we set conditions for our self-love and happiness, i.e. “I’m going to lose 20 lbs this year - then I’ll feel better,” we affirm to ourselves that we aren’t enough just as we are - and that doesn’t feel good for anyone.

So how do we set ourselves up for success? Let me clue you in to a few secrets that will allow you to move toward your goals from a place of self-love, clarity, and beautiful inner worth:
YOU ARE ENOUGH:
Here’s the thing, doll: You. Are. Enough. You are enough exactly as you are, without changing a gosh-dang thing. Achieving goals from a place of self-love requires holding polarity - the idea that two opposing concepts can simultaneously be true. Concept One: You are enough as you are and don’t need to change a thing in your life! And - Concept Two - you will continue growing, changing, and stepping into a higher version of yourself as your life progresses.

So before you even set your goals for the year, I want you to sit in that truth. These goals aren’t going to change your value, my love. You already have that value. You get to work toward them, you get to nurture yourself, you get  to step into your best self yet. These goals aren’t the key to your happiness and worth - they are going to highlight your beautiful soul with an even brighter light.
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REPLACE “RESOLUTIONS” WITH “INTENTIONS":
Resolutions are these weighted ideals we set for ourselves at the beginning of each year. The reality is that we can engage in goal-setting and reevaluation anytime, and that if we move forward with softer intentions, we are more likely to achieve our goals because we’ve lessened the pressure of “having” to achieve these resolutions in order to feel successful.

So what does intention setting look like? Let’s walk through it, babe.
  1. Start by CELEBRATING! Reflect on the past year, and create a gratitude list for everything you achieved. This can be as big as, “I got that promotion I was after!” and as small as, “On that day I felt like absolute shit, I showered.” Life can be freakin’ hard, man! You thrived your way through another year, and you deserve to be celebrated for every day you walked through.
  2. Once you’re in that self-love mindset, take a few minutes to brainstorm what you’d like to implement into all areas of your life, whether that’s a habit to engage in or a goal you’d like to accomplish. Let your mind and pen run free (I do encourage writing this out by hand).
  3. Take a breath, and acknowledge how complete you already are.
  4. Now, set those intentions from a present mindset; instead of, “I will achieve this,” say, “I am achieving this.” Example: “I eat the foods that nourish my body,” “I sing to crowds of 1,000 people” “I read 1 book per week,” “I’m attending that course."
  5. Release the timeline. We tell ourselves resolutions have to happen in a certain timeframe, and that pressure often keeps us from moving forward. When we’re convinced we have to get from Point A to Point B in a certain amount of time, it can keep us from taking action. By letting go of the timeline, you free yourself to simply take action and move toward your intentions, one step at a time, with so much less pressure - and that’s how we find ourselves making progress! Remember:
  6. It isn’t really about the end goal. Losing that 20 pounds, singing on that stage, reading more, and attending that course will not be what makes you feel happy, complete, or worthy. Achieving those wonderful things is simply a bonus to nurture the beautiful soul you already are. Yes, I bet that 20 pound loss and that sold-out performance are going to feel really, really freakin’ good - but you know what feels SO good? The journey of getting there. At some point between now and 20 pounds fewer, you’ll have lost 10. Maybe you’ll have started going to the gym, or taking a new dance class. Maybe you’ll have started a plant-based lifestyle, or drinking bulletproof coffee, or taking more walks in nature. Focus on that incredible experience of growth and change, and you’ll both find that the end goal doesn’t matter so much - and that you’re so much more likely to achieve it.
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NEXT STEPS:
Now that you’ve gained clarity for your intentions, here are two key tips to continuing to work toward your goals!
  1. Set Affirmations:
Remember those present-tense intention statements? We’re going to take those even further. We’re going to sit with how it feels to be achieving these goals. Take that, “I eat the foods that nourish my body," statement and write out everything you feel as the version of yourself eating those foods! “I never knew I could have this much energy! Being able to wake up with my kids each morning, get them to school, and still have the energy to take time for myself is so incredible. I love how often I get to see nature now; those daily walks around the neighborhood are bringing me so much light and joy!”
Step into that version of yourself and watch him/her/them come to life!

  1. ​Take Action, Everyday:
Affirmations, mantras, and intentions are all incredible steps to lead you to your goals. But you could set all of the intentions in the world, and if you never take actions - well, those intentions aren’t going to just bring themselves to life!

Now that you know what it feels like to step into those goals, it’s time to break down the steps that will get you started on your journey from here to there. To create those steps, ask yourself these questions: What knowledge does that version of you have? What does your day-to-day life look like? What actions are you taking everyday to maintain that lifestyle?

Let's throw in an example from my own affirmations:
“I am so grateful for my sold-out national tour.”

I know that to achieve that, I would need to have a following across the country; a consistent online brand to maintain engagement between tour dates; I would need the knowledge of how to book venues outside of my local market; I would need merchandise and music recordings to share my message and music with my audiences.

This year, I’ve broken that down into smaller steps. I’ve never been on tour! To get to a hella awesome sold-out one, I first need to know if touring is something I actually love doing. So this summer, I’m going on my first one! (What city are you in? Holla at ya girl so I can let you know when I’m visiting you! https://www.instagram.com/hanakahnofficial/) I’ve broken down my tour into small increments I can act on each day: (1) Make a list of cities I’d like to travel to. (2) Create a map of the route I’ll take to get to each one. (3) Calculate the gas mileage so I can factor in my expenses.

These actions take at most an hour each, and by taking them each day, my tour goes from a fantasy dream to a reality I’ve created.
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What small steps can you take now to move toward your goal(s) and follow your intentions? If you’re a hardcore #GoalGetter like me and sometimes focus a l’il bit too much on the end result, I have a fabulous recommendation for you:
Keep a checklist of all of these smaller tasks you accomplish each day. At the end of each month, look over that checklist and acknowledge & celebrate everything you’ve accomplished. At the beginning of December, I hadn’t started planning my tour at all. I now have all of my dates calculated for my East Coast segment and a breakdown of the travel time between each - and most importantly, I trust and believe that it is all coming together, and that I’m so worthy of doing the work to get there.

Happy 2019, babe! The best is yet to come.
1 Comment
Matia Angelou
1/7/2019 09:29:22 am

Great blog - very wise - my yoga teacher (the minister at Open Spirit) had the same advice about "intentions" rather than "resolutions" - she felt that intentions were softer and kinder to ourselves, that we could become too judgmental and down on ourselves if we don't fulfill our resolutions. Here's to a joyful and healthful 2019!

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