What I learned from 65 days on the road.

​30 states, 11,180 miles and 65 days later, I find myself sitting at the table in my living room, a lit candle on the corner and a mug of tea right next to me, reminding me, “You Are Enough.” As light pours in through my east-facing windows (#manifested), I feel a sense of ease around the beautiful familiarity of home, and I begin to process and reflect on my takeaways from my first ever original music tour. Ready to dive in?

(1) THE TACTICAL.

• Do not plan for drives longer than 10 hours when driving solo. 10 hours can be done, but even that is too much. Seriously, stick with an 8-hour max.
• When traveling the country, buy a year-long parking pass to enter National Parks. You’re going to want to go to them whether you’ve planned on it or not.
• If you want loose-leaf tea, buy it. I’m still regretting not getting the various teas I found on the road.
• Always have a cooler! Why would you ever not? I waited until the last two weeks of my tour to get one and I can’t believe I ever traveled without it.
• Remember that you will need to schedule in real-life tasks, like prescriptions and oil changes and stopping for a bath bomb when you find out your host has a bathtub.

Above: Drinking tea in Albuquerque, NM

(2) FEAR DOESN’T HAVE TO DRIVE YOU - BUT YOU DO NEED BOUNDARIES.

Before I left, people kept telling me to be afraid. I’m a small woman and I have a very eccentric energy. “People will take advantage of you if your heart is that open,” I was told. And yet, I couldn’t get myself to experience fear.

I did my research. I kept my valuables hidden; my car windows are tinted; and I was aware of which cities and districts had higher crime and assault rates. I was smart about it.

But I wasn’t afraid. When I step into fear around another person, I become smaller and reduce my naturally bold energy. Walking into these travels, I refused to accept the idea that the way to stay safe was by muting myself. I instead turned inward and chose to clarify my boundaries.

How do I best claim my power? Is there a point at which I need to leave a conversation, or assertively let someone know their language or behavior is crossing a line? What are the needs I need to fulfill to ensure I feel safe in my body? If I run into a situation I find triggering, how can I come back to myself once I’ve left the interaction?

Having the clarity to these questions provided me with ease: I could have held caution and anxiety around the people I met, waiting for a line to be crossed or waiting to become smaller in my discomfort. I was instead able to stay fully present in my interactions - even the ones that left my eyes rolling (seriously, why do some people think gross words will get them a date?) - knowing that no matter what, I can come back to my own safety and boundaries - and there is nothing I find more empowering than that. 

Above: Being my badass loud-energy self on a rooftop in Kentucky

(3) CREATE FAMILIARITY.

On the road, there’s not much familiarity to be found. You’re in a different place every night, the weather changes, the environment changes, the popular foods change, you’re staying on a new couch and meeting new people - it is not what one would call settling.

Routine and familiarity are really important to me, and without a sense of external comfort, I had to spend some time navigating what it meant to create internal ease. I created a mini morning routine that involved two journals: a personal thoughts journal and a tour log. I kept my possessions as organized as possible in my car. I brought hand and ankle weights on the road so I could do a quick workout routine at rest stops. I looked up coffee and tea shops in each city so I could work and drink tea during down time.

There are definitely more elements I’ll incorporate next summer (packing a watch so I don’t have to check my phone in the morning; meditation; researching gym memberships). Overall, I know finding this connection within myself was one of the biggest factors in me navigating this journey healthily and with such joy. 

Above: Journaling in the 114-degree weather of Phoenix, AZ

(4) YOU CAN DO ANYTHING.

I mean okay, I straight up preach how Limitless we are. But man, the things we’re capable of sometimes completely blow my mind!

Going into this tour, I felt confident in the ways I would show up for my career, my self-care, my fitness, my music, my relationships - but I didn’t feel comfortable in my day-to-day life.

I was a hardcore avoider of errands and phone calls: I didn’t want to set up appointments, or call insurance, or pick up prescriptions, or take my car in for repairs, and I would procrastinate those types of tasks for as long as I could.

On the road, I had to face myself. I had to get oil changes and car washes. I had to fill prescriptions in CVS locations around the country. And beyond those smaller things that are now actually starting to feel less heavy and less burdensome, I had some pretty intense experiences that pushed me to show myself how capable I am of dealing with life shit all on my very own:

• On the 3rd day of this tour, I walked out of a gig for the first time ever. I felt disrespected and decided money wasn’t worth sacrificing my values. In that moment, the idea solidified in me that money is abundant, and that I can choose to earn it in the environments that leave me feeling nourished.
• In July, the hybrid battery in my Prius started dying. I was stranded in Illinois for multiple days before dragging my car very slowly across 950 miles of the midwest - until it finally died 50 miles before my Colorado destination and I had to give in and get it towed.
• Mid-August, I found out my insurance was expiring in early September and have navigated what it means to turn 26 and enroll in healthcare - all while on the road.
• In the last week of my travels, Arkansas met me with a car accident on the highway. (I am on my way back to 100%, as is my car. So grateful, my loves, and all is okay.)

It wasn’t a question to me, when any of these events came up, that I could deal with it on my own. I snapped into Action mode and navigated the steps, phone calls, tactics, and anything else that needed navigating to move through each of these chapters.

Now, the idea that I could ever not handle something like that is crazy to me - but when I think about it, it was only two months ago that I was a version of me whose anxiety would have had her shutting down at the very idea of handling this alone. 

Above: Last day of my travels at Liberty Farm in New Jersey!

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Throughout this journey, I met myself where I was at during every single stage. This experience was ridden with learning and connection; with overwhelming beauty and extremely hard moments; with life-changing experiences and lifelong relationships. Thank you so, so much, my babes, for giving me a space to process and reflect on this with you.

If there is one thing you take away from this, I hope you feel and know how Limitless we are. This struggling, traumatized high school dropout built up her dream life - and is, most importantly, connected and full of inner peace. You can do this, my love. What are your dreams?